Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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