At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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