doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
