that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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