Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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