i think my mom watched the whole time
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
