It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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