Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
When are your genitals available?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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