is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
