I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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