If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
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