You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
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