she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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