i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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