But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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