I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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