member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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