hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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