Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
