All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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