we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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