so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
