I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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