I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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