We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
