We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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