Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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