I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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