please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
jump out the window naked night went bad
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