You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
