Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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