you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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