I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
