i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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