so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
