3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
