does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
