I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
