That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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