So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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