Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
