I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
