I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
handjob tips. give me some.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
