Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
last night I used snow as a chaser
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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