when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Randomize