Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
