Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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