after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
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