just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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