sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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